Snippet – Top 10 Reasons Why I Won’t Miss Commuter Railroad Travel

10. Tone deaf, Sammy Davis impersonating, station performers who can’t carry a tune.

9. Riders who feel that the existence of a quiet car gives them the right to blast their music or talk as loud as they want in other cars, since if you say something to them about their volume, they have an inherent, ironclad defense of, “Whatever man, go to the quiet car then.”

8. Being asked to stay home from work by railroad management instead of you know, riding the actual trains I pay to access.

7. On that note, paying hundreds of dollars a month for my ticket and getting #8 level of service in return.

6. The woman handing out her free periodicals at the station street exit who practically threatens you with physical violence if you don’t take that morning’s edition from her.

5. The genius layout of tracks going into a funnel station. Seriously, how does a tree branch on the tracks shut down the entire system? Does the railroad not have one former Infantryman on their staff? Ask those guys. Bottlenecks are not good.

4. Combined, standing room only (and by standing room I mean packed in like cattle pressed up against all manner of humanity you’d rather not be touching) trains, or worse…

3. Delays. And cancellations. And delays. And cancellations. And…

2. Oh, and let’s not forget, the never-ending barrage of apologies for numbers 3 & 4. Fun fact, apologies don’t mean shit if you never fix the problem and keep doing the same thing day in and day out.

1. And finally, no surprise here, having to spend upwards of 3 hours a day, everyday, to commute on an antiquated system while paying exorbitant amounts of money for the privilege of being subjected to seemingly endless failures of which everyone responsible is not held accountable and we, the patrons, bear the brunt of this unacceptable, perpetual status quo.